Sunday, May 15, 2011

Confession: I'm a Parselmouth

"I can speak to snakes.  I found out when we've been to the country on trips — they find me, they whisper to me.  Is that normal for a wizard?"

Thankssss, amigo!
Okay, so V-Mart said that and my character was less narcissistic about his ability.

The other day, my wife, daughter, and I were at a local park, when we walked past an old school bathroom (like something from a reptile house -- or Hogwarts).  Long story short, turns out we saw what we think was a Black Rat Snake, hanging on the windowsill, its long tail tucked into the corner of an old, grated window.  I'd say it was as short as three feet or as long as four or five.

We called the police (hey, the thing could have been a Basilisk, for all we knew!), and they showed up like two days later.  Okay, after about 30-40 minutes.  We wanted to avoid creating a panic, so I sat by the bathroom and, uh, kept watch, until they arrived.

Two little girls came skipping down to the reptile house, err, bathroom, and were perplexed, when I told them to go and ask their parents for permission.  "Our parents already said we could," the girls insisted.  "Did they know there was a snake in the bathroom?" I asked.  Both girls apparently failed to distinguish the snake from the brick and one started walking into the bathroom . . .  I sternly told her to come back, and, once the girls had it click in their minds what I was talking about, they ran away, screaming, "Snaaaaake!"

Is the Chamber of Secrets located underneath a wash closet in a Cincinnati park?
"Oh, great," I thought.  Some dad's going to come down, looking to punch me in the face because he thinks I'm a weirdo, hanging out by the girl's bathroom.  Actually, their father just stood in the door, with his back to the snake and commanded the girls to go to the bathroom because, darn it, they said they had to go!  (I think both girls felt differently, at that point.)

Once the folks in white showed up, one of them wanted to get out some kind of extendable stick and put the snake in the trees.  "No, Bill!  What if it's somebody's pet or it's poisonous or something!?"  Ah, yes, the calm-headed reasoning of the female officer won out, and we presume they waited until animal control (or someone similar) turned up.

Good times, eh?

I'd give you two non-stock photos from my "1.3 Mage Pixels Mobile Camera" (it literally says "Mage"), except they're pretty low resolution, and I lack a way to transfer them, anyway.  Just pretend like this is Hairless and use your imagination.  Savvy?  Awesome.

(See my wife's blog for more.)

3 comments:

Pam said...

You guys have just one adventure after another out there! You will have soooo many stories to tell around the Thanksgiving dinner table for years to come! :)

Cougar Abogado said...

"You know me, Mrs. Weasley, I like a quiet life." Yes, being Harry Potter and co., we do have many adventures! =D

Maybe we'll start doing slideshow presentations, at Thanksgiving. B-)

Christy said...

Yeah, scary moment. I'm glad it didn't add more suspense to finals week!